Hold Your Identity Lightly
Holding your identity lightly means being aware that strong identification with labels can narrow thinking, but recognizing that complete avoidance of labels is impractical. Instead, one should prevent identities from colonizing thoughts and values.
THE IDEA
Hold Your Identity Lightly
I was alarmed when I first started noticing how much power our identities have over our thinking. That was about ten years ago, around the time a popular essay on this topic came out titled “Keep Your Identity Small,” by tech investor Paul Graham. In it, Graham pointed to the problem I described in the previous chapter and warned, “The more labels you have for yourself, the dumber they make you.” Inspired in part by Graham’s essay, I resolved to avoid identifying myself with any ideology, movement, or group.
This plan of mine quickly ran into problems.
For starters, avoiding labels proved awkward. At the time I followed a more or less vegan diet; when someone was planning a dinner party and asked me about my dietary restrictions, it was a lot easier and less confusing to just say “I’m a vegan” than to say “Well, I don’t eat eggs, or dairy, or meat . . .” Plus, having a restricted diet was already enough of an imposition on my friends and family. When other people referred to me as “a vegan,” I sure as hell wasn’t going to jump in and correct them: “Actually, I prefer to be called a person who eats a vegan diet.”
More seriously, there were causes I wanted to help, groups and movements I genuinely believed were doing good, like effective altruism. If I wasn’t willing to identify myself publicly with a movement, it was going to be hard to help spread its ideas.
I did end up with a few lasting changes from my foray into identitylessness. For example, I stopped referring to myself as a Democrat, even though I’m officially registered to vote as a Democrat. But I ultimately accepted that there’s a limit to how far you can take this process. What you need to be able to do is keep those identities from colonizing your thoughts and values. I call this “holding your identity lightly.”
When to use it
When engaging in political discussions, avoid rigid party identification to stay open to evidence and reasoned arguments.
When adopting a dietary or lifestyle change, use descriptive language or practical labels without letting the label define your entire worldview.
When joining a social movement or advocacy group, publicly support its goals but retain the ability to question its methods or direction.
When interacting with people of different backgrounds, be aware of how your own group identities might lead to biased thinking.
FROM THEORY TO EVERYDAY LIFE
In practice
Vegan Diet Identity
The author found it awkward to avoid the label 'vegan' when explaining dietary restrictions, realizing that using the label was more practical than a lengthy description. Avoiding labels can mean giving up their convenience.
Political Party Identification
The author stopped calling himself a Democrat despite being registered, showing how one can hold a political identity lightly—using the label for practical purposes but not letting it dominate his thinking.
A MOMENT TO REFLECT
Put it to work.
What labels do you hold tightly that might be limiting your openness to new evidence?
In which areas of your life could you benefit from describing your choices rather than using an identity label?
How can you publicly support a cause you believe in while still maintaining a critical, independent mindset?
References
- Keep Your Identity Small — Paul Graham
CONTINUE THE CONVERSATION
Source texts
- The Scout Mindset (Julia Galef)