Why Bother? Nothing Is Worth Caring About.

“Why Bother? Nothing Is Worth Caring About.”

Since Greens rarely make the first move and almost always allow others to step up first, you can easily get the impression that a Green is not especially interested or engaged. And often that’s the case. He is more passive than he is active, and this has an impact on his behavior. Not much is going on there.

And what does it really matter? If you stay at home—nothing can really go wrong then, right? What Greens fail to see is that most other people want to do things. They assume that everyone thinks as they do and stays on the sofa. They are satisfied with doing nothing. Anything that upsets this standpoint becomes a threat. The result? Even more passivity.

On one occasion, I heard a Red-Yellow boss describe his employees as uninspired and uninterested in their work. It tormented him because no matter how hard he tried to entice and insist, they never left the starting block. He presented numerous ideas—some of which were very interesting—but nothing happened. It can be like that with Greens. They recognize a good idea as quickly as anyone else. But, for example, while their Red colleagues sprint off with the baton, a Green just sits and waits. Often they’re waiting for the right feeling to convince them of an idea’s merit and if that doesn’t happen, well … they wouldn’t do anything anyway, so they get what they want. Why not just wait and see if the urge to act goes away?

This particular boss called in his employees and asked them how they viewed the business. He was worried about the evident lack of discernible commitment. A couple of the men, who were lower middle age, said straight-out that they couldn’t think of anything that was worth getting involved in. The boss became extremely frustrated. He tried everything but got virtually no reaction.

This can also happen in a marriage. There are stereotypes for everything. Like that some women might be drawn to the strong, silent type, for example. Nothing wrong with that. But after they’re married and she realizes that this is all that he is—strong and silent—she may not be as happy. And when she makes plans and he says he doesn’t care, she gets frustrated. And so she makes even bigger plans. And he clutches the armrests on his favorite recliner even harder.

This is the paradox. The bigger the plans, the less likely it is that a Green will commit. All he wants is peace and quiet.

Here’s an example: I’ve been writing fiction for twenty years and really hoped to become a published author one day. Everyone in the family knew this. Not that I made a huge deal out of it, but I didn’t hide my ambitions, either. One Green close to me understood how important it was for me to succeed. I have repeatedly spoken about my dream, explaining how it would make me feel if I succeeded as an author of fiction. Yet this Green never asked how my writing was going. Maybe a comment every five years that I shouldn’t take things so seriously or I will only be disappointed. And when I said things like: “This year it will happen. Now is the time, damn it. I’ve got to work harder to succeed!” the response was: “Wow. That’s a lot of work.” Lots of work is a Green’s greatest enemy, just because that’s exactly what it is—work. They live in a mind-set that everything should be easy.

This form of indifference and lack of commitment can kill the enthusiasm of even the most inspired person. I had to learn to rely on others to find the energy to struggle on with my writing. But a Green doesn’t understand this. He doesn’t want people to be too involved, because it’s just bothersome. Instead, let’s just sit here and do … nothing.