What’s Thought in Secret Is Said in Secret
Thomas Erikson describes Greens as preferring indirect communication on sensitive subjects. In his color framework, this can help avoid conflict while leaving listeners uncertain about the speaker’s position.
THE IDEA
What’s Thought in Secret Is Said in Secret
Greens are reluctant to take a position on sensitive issues. They have just as many views and opinions as anyone else, but they don’t like shouting them from the rooftops. The reason is simple—it can cause a fuss.
The consequence of this tendency is a rather abstruse manner of expressing themselves. Instead of saying, “That’s impossible,” they may respond with something like, “It appears that there are a few challenges in delivering that.” Sure, both statements mean the same thing: “We won’t manage to do it in time.” But by using a less direct means of expression, you take fewer risks. If you take a clear stance on something, then you have to stand up for it.
For a Green, it’s better to be safe than sorry. By expressing himself ambiguously, he avoids taking responsibility for the matter in question. He doesn’t have to risk his good name if he’s uncertain. If he hasn’t taken a position in support of something, he also hasn’t taken any position against something. You hear how illogical this sounds, right? But if you’re Green, you know exactly what I mean. A woman I met once said that she believed what everyone else believed.
But are Greens perceived as unclear just because they want to save a relationship? No, not at all. Greens just aren’t as precise as the other colors. When a Red says that he absolutely hates listening to Eminem, a Green would say that he remembers better singers. When a Blue says that he has lost five pounds since last Tuesday morning at 10:03, a Green says that he’s lost a few pounds lately.
This is because Greens are not as task oriented as Reds and Blues. Greens don’t speak about facts in the same way. They would rather speak about relationships and feelings, which makes it more difficult to be precise. How do you measure a feeling? Saying, “I love you exactly twelve percent more than last month,” is just not going to work.
When to use it
In a team meeting, a Green manager might avoid stating a clear deadline, leading to confusion and missed targets.
When giving feedback, a Green might soften criticism to maintain harmony, but the message may be lost or misunderstood.
In negotiations, a Green might not state their bottom line explicitly, potentially weakening their position.
When discussing sensitive topics in a group, a Green may use vague language to avoid offending anyone, which can hinder productive debate.
FROM THEORY TO EVERYDAY LIFE
In practice
Expressing Impossibility
Instead of saying 'That’s impossible,' a Green might say 'It appears that there are a few challenges in delivering that.'
Preference in Music
When a Red says 'I absolutely hate listening to Eminem,' a Green would say 'I remember better singers.'
Weight Loss
When a Blue says 'I have lost five pounds since last Tuesday morning at 10:03,' a Green says 'I’ve lost a few pounds lately.'
A MOMENT TO REFLECT
Put it to work.
How might your own communication style reflect a tendency to avoid conflict?
In what situations could being more direct improve clarity and accountability?
How can you balance relationship preservation with precise communication?
Often confused with
CONTINUE THE CONVERSATION
Source texts
- Surrounded By Idiots (Thomas Erikson)